A passion of mine is learning about people who live so
different than the way I live. Culture is fascinating to me. This is a list
I’ve made, just scratching the surface, of cultural differences I have
encountered here in Rwanda:
*Men who are friends hold hands all the time – and yes they
are just friends. Although I feel like
I’m pretty adaptable and sensitive to cultural difference, this one is still
hard for me to get use to because of the huge connotation of this practice in
the states.
*The last name of a person isn’t actually a patriarchal
family name, it is a name parents give the child based on the circumstances of
the birth (Mukeshimana – meaning a promise from God).
*Relating to this, many Rwandese names end with “imana”
(meaning God) due to the prominence of Religion/Christianity here. 94% of
Rwandans identify themselves with the Christian faith. Once Rwandans get
baptized, they obtain a western, Christian name. (Mukeshimana Emmanuel).
*Pastors in Rwanda achieve a very high social status (and
are paid very well), while in America (depending on the church and the area of
America of course), pastors might not be paid so well and are not necessarily
known as having a high-end job.
*Instead of nodding the head to indicate saying “yes”,
Rwandans do a slight eyebrow raise and sometimes murmur “eh”. The eyebrow raise
is so slight many Americans wouldn’t know that the Rwandan answered their
question at all.
*Because people walk or ride motos everywhere in Rwanda,
cars beep all the time to let people know they are there. Unlike the states,
beeping is not considered rude; it is to make sure the hundreds of people
walking next to the car don’t get run over.
*Rwandans (especially women) don’t run. Mostly they think it’s hilarious when they see
us running. Something I still can’t figure out is that when they see you
running, they will quite often run with you or after you. At first I thought
they were making fun of me. However, as it happens more and more, I noticed they
don’t really smile; they sometimes don’t even look at you; they literally just
run with you. Is it because they feel they need to? Is it because they do
actually want to make fun you? I still can’t figure this one out.
*When referring to the American way of life, our religion
and culture professor, Pastor Antoine, says it perfectly; “Are you people human
beings or human doings? In Africa we want you to come here to “be” not to “do”.
We want to sit and talk and ask you about your life”
*In America, we get straight to the point when talking about
something, or asking something. Rwandans (or Africans generally speaking), talk
in circles. They will tell you a story, or talk around the subject before
getting to the point. They beat around the bush. This is apart of the high
context culture here. It is easy for Americans to get frustrated because in our
culture we talk straightforward; we get straight to the point.
*As apart of African culture, if you are on the same level
economically as someone else, you are loyal to one another. People in Rwanda
feel that if they steal from a white person or a rich person, it is not sinful
and it is not an issue. They are not on the rich person’s level, they have no
loyalty to them, and they have money anyway, so what’s the big deal? The same
goes for exploiting the poor.
*Men in Rwanda do not show public affection, because public
affection is a sign of weakness. Men do not hold their wife’s hand or show
affection to their children because Rwandan culture is very reserved in terms
of affection, and they have very little terms of endearment. However in
American culture, we are (very generally speaking) pretty outwardly
affectionate. However, Americans still have the highest divorce rate in the
world.
*Very contrary to America, Rwandese men conceptualize a
beautiful woman as a very plump woman. They like their hips. And believe me,
Rwandan women have hips.
*Because of the “elastic” concept of time, any event will go
for 4 or 5 hours, it always starts about 2 hours late, and will go for as long
as people stay. People will come when they want, they will stay for how long
they want, and they will leave when they want. This can come as a shock to an
American whose attention span is not use to lasting that long.
*Rwandan education is about the teacher telling you
something (whether you understand it or not), and the student spitting back the
information. The schools don’t stress thinking critically or thinking for
yourself which is prominent in the American education system.
*In traditional African cultures, you do not marry your
husband; you marry your husband and his whole family. When you go visit your
husband’s family, his brother and his father and his cousins all call you “our
wife”. This is apart of the communal life in Africa.
*Similarly in Rwanda, when two people get engaged, they have
“community meetings” to plan their wedding. This is because a marriage is a
community thing. It is not only between two people, it is between two people,
their families and their communities.
Like i said, this list is simply 'scratching the surface'. I am learning new things about Rwandese culture every day, and most importantly why it is different.
